Elections concerns … which might not be real
Posted by Aaron - 06/08/10 at 08:08:41 pmI voted on Tuesday and did a pretty good job of it.
While I won’t disclose who I voted for, I will say that no one I picked won. I’m like the political kiss of death. Sorry.
But I did get confused. After successfully navigating the ballot (it’s a primary so you can’t cross the center line and vote for both parties LAME), I couldn’t navigate my way out of the polling place. I walked right out the entrance and didn’t know until I saw the big signs — “Enter Only,” and “Exit Only” — in the parking lot.
Concerned, I did what anyone would do and wrote an email to the local reporter covering the elections.
Dear Holly, (she covered the elections)
After voting today, I accidentally exited the polling place through the entrance door. It wasn’t until after I was outside that I saw the big signs that said “Enter Only” and “Exit Only.” There were no signs inside, and I was very confused.
Will my vote still count? I hope so.
I think the confusing signs are a ploy by Obama or those Tea Party people to take away my right to vote for my favorite American Idol singer.
Signed,
Concerned/confused voter
She wrote me back.
Dear Concerned Voter,
According to city Clerk Lynn Fessel, your vote will still count despite the mishap. Signs were posted to prevent congestion at poll entrance and exits and were intended to smooth the flow of pedestrian traffic at precincts, given the tremendous voter turnout that is expected in this important election.
You are welcome to vote for your favorite American Idol contestant in the write-in portion on the ballot. However it is likely that person does not live in the applicable state House, Senate or Congressional district, so they could not take office (or become the next American Idol, which has a completely different voting structure).
Thinking all that was pretty funny, I came up with a few more, but didn’t send these to Holly. She was pretty busy with the real election stuff.
Dear Holly,
I was surprised to walk into my polling place and not have Simon, Randy and Paula (OK, Ellen, but I don’t listen to a word she says, love ya Paula) tell me what they thought of the candidates. How am I supposed to vote for the best one?
Signed,
♥♥
P.S. I couldn’t find numbers to text my vote to anywhere on the ballot. WTF?
Dear Holly,
I went to the polls wearing my Barack Obama T-shirt, the one with the really cool red, white and blue themed photo of him, the famous one. However, I did not see Obama’s name on the ballot. Voting for him is so much fun. Why can’t I vote for him every year?
Signed,
First time voter in 2008
Dear Holly,
I don’t see politics (or anything really) as a matter of black and white, so I brought a box of crayons to the polls today. I filled the bubbles next to the candidates’ names using a color code, like black for “I don’t like you,” and pink for “I really like you” and all the colors in between for “I kind of like you.” Around some bubbles I drew a heart or star to show that I really like them. For some candidates I took out my scissors and cut their names right off the ballot. We won’t go into why.
This way, I feel my true vote was cast. Will it count?
Signed,
Local elementary school art teacher
Dear Holly,
I voted today, and like I do every year, I voted for myself. Yup, I wrote myself in for every race on the ballot. And like every year, I except to finish with just one vote in each race (except for the county commission. Dave, I owe you, thanks for the vote.) And like every year, I expect to be shunned by the local paper. I spent $3 on my campaign (don’t worry about it Dave, the beer was on me), and it didn’t even buy me an article, photo or phone call. I expect, once again, that my name will not be included in tomorrow’s election results.
You call this democracy?
Signed,
The guy who also writes lots of letters to the editor
Enjoy.
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